I used to work in a refrigerated meat processing factory. One of my colleagues operated a mincing machine in a cold room and often, with all that huffing and puffing from manual labour, would suffer from chaffed cheeks.

Brighton fans, can you suggest any remedies for chaffed cheeks caused by excessive mincing.?

Edited by Forest Hillbilly (29 Apr 2010 8:06am)

"The facts have changed", Rishi Sunak

bit of a rip off to the above but anyways....

My friend is starring in a play as Frodo in the stage production of 'Lord of the rings'. Are there any BHA fans who can provide advice as how to play a character who has had his ring destroyed???

All very interesting however a more pressing matter for me at the moment is about my hobby of potholing.

I am planning a trip to the Brighton area and the site of a former mine, long since closed, which has miles and miles of tunnels (that can get you very lost in the pitch black darkness) and are filled with huge underground puddles you can easily trip and fall into and end up absolutely saturated ande covered in clinging horrible mud.

Would you be able to advise if there are any guides I could talk to in the Brighton area who could tell me how to navigate down a long shaft in the dark and not end up soaking wet and covered in a sticky clinging mess ?

Edited by The Sash (30 Apr 2010 10:20am)

As far as the rules go, it's a website not a democracy - Hambo 3/6/2014

Crystal Palace have managed to retain their status in the Championship for another season.

Brighton fans, what is the longest period of time you have managed to 'stay up', before suffering from erectile disfunction ?

I reckon about 2 minutes, but that's all you can hope for when you are looking at blokes in tight shorts.

Falmer is the largest erection you have ever had. And it is taking soooo long to put up.

"The facts have changed", Rishi Sunak

Well, thanks for asking:

Struggling with the rent, wages, bills, administrator, etc.

Probably have to move ground soon - if someone will have us on the cheap.

Been told to "realise our assets into cash" which I think means sell our players,

and stayed up by a handful of points, yet very much looking forward to a promotion push next year.

Can I take you to a restaurant
that's got glass tables
You can watch yourself
while you are eating.

I have recently opened delicatessen specialising in meats from around the world.

The problem I have is that the supplier from Germany deliver their cold meats so early in the morning, it has to be left at the back door.

This has attracted the attention of the local alley cats, who somehow manage to open the boxes and chew on the contents, thereby ruining them.

Can any Brighton fans advise me on how best to hide a selection of sausages up a back passage without attracting the attention of the locals?